"Expert repair' is the devotional today. I laughed when I read it. I am an apprentice handy man, meaning I can sort of fix stuff sometimes, however, it will take me a LOT longer to get it done! The funniest example is the first time I installed a water line for an automatic ice maker. The home improvement store wanted $75 to install it. I said "Heck no, I can do that!" FOUR HOURS later I finally got it installed! I am proud to say the next two times I installed a water line it took me about 30 minutes each time!
That is sort of the point in the devotional. There can be discomfort or even pain in repairing the things that are broken in our lives. Sometimes we don't even know something is broken because it has always been that way! My family had a joke when I was a child that the car manufacturer Ford stood for "Fix or repair daily". I challenge each of us to make this our prayer to God -- "Fix or repair me daily, O Lord". The temporary pain and discomfort is more than worth the results! (see the next section for an example...)
We-way-shun-ship Wednesday
Some folks may think that most of prayers the past few years have been about my health. There have been a lot of prayers and needs there. The most "active" area of my life has been personal growth in the area of relationships. My relationship of 11.5 years to a wonderful man ended about three years ago. That was one of the most difficult things I have ever experienced. At least I was unconscious when the doctors cut the cancer out of my body! The pain subsided a few days later.
So I started counseling. I started praying. I knew I could be a better husband. A better friend. A better everything! I made a lot of mistakes. I hurt some people along the way. I bounced back and forth between two very special men while I was dealing with my codependency issues, hurting them and myself in my confusion (I will discuss "Ying and Yang" more in a later post). I never really thought about that being an issue for me since I have always been very independent.
Where am I now? I am in maintenance mode. Through the counseling and many prayers, sometimes knock-down-drag-out arguments with God, He has delivered me from these issues. I cannot maintain this without relying on God. There are still times where I am attracted to a handsome man that I describe as "bearish and broken". :-p
Through all of the struggle, God has taught me to rely on Him while making my dating decisions. I feel that I have His promise that my next someone special is on his way into my life. I am finally ready. So, God, please... please continue to Fix Or Repair Me daily so I can be the kind of man I want to be. To be the kind of man that my special someone wants and needs.
Other stuff
I finished the book "Conquering Fear" last night. I will review the highlighted points again. I found it very interesting and helpful. I never thought of myself as a fearful person. I discovered that some of the "scenarios" that I think about too much and some of my odd dreams are based on fears. As part of my FORD prayer, I am asking God to help me identify and face my fears head on like I do everything else in my life.
I am taking a certification test for work on Aug 3, so most of my reading will be studying this week. I have the book "The Power of Two" in my briefcase to start next.
No comments:
Post a Comment