Our Daily Bread
The devotional today hit me hard. God has been dealing with me about some habitual sins. I was reminded of many sermons that I heard in my youth when I read the devotional summary:
Repentance means hating sin enough to turn from it.
Wow! There are some things in your spiritual life that you know. You never really forget them. This concept of "turning from sin" is one that I need to be reminded of constantly. Like every human being, I have some habitual sins. No, I am not going to tell you what they are! hehehe I ask God for forgiveness, but I don't really seem to repent! I keep repeating the sins! Yikes!
Do you have some "pet sins" that you repeat and don't really repent from? Let us pray for each other!
Lord, I want to truly repent from my pet sins and do my best to commit them no more! Thank you for your strength.
My Journey towards Humility by Duane Fitzpatrick
Celebration from Chapter 28:
When we move from a self-centered existence to a God-centered existence, we move from anxiety to joy.
My road towards humility started in 2007 with the breakup of my 11.5 year long term relationship. That breakup was one of the most difficult times in my life! Over the course of the next few years, I lost my job at Chase, I had several health problems including the start of my eye issues and almost lost a foot due to a rare infection, and I had several relationship attempts fail miserably.
When I finally started giving things over to God, he immediately started breaking down what I call "the big three": my pride, selfishness and arrogance. Those are tough things to say about yourself! He started with internal healing from Bible study and from many sessions with a counselor. My pride and arrogance were hurt because I was in counseling. I had always been the strong one! God helped me see that my strength was often a facade. He was tearing me down so he could build me up again the right way. My health issues also taught me several lessons about faith and about the "big three". God was rebuilding me into the kind of compassionate, unselfish and empathetic man he wanted me to be. One example is a couple at King Avenue that I had never met told me one morning they had been praying for my eyes. I rambled on for a few minutes and then finally listened to them tell me one of them had similar issues. Things had not gone as well for her, however, she continued to pray for me. We keep in touch and pray for each other now. God added gratitude to the list of things I needed to practice daily.
God lead me to the Our Daily Bread devotional web site. I started reading it every day. Last July, I started writing about the daily devotional in my blog. That devotional is where God gave me the basis for my upgraded personality -- a quiet, confident joy. It is a calm, comforting sense that you know God is in control. His angels are at your side. His will has your best interests at heart. It is a joy that no one or nothing on this earth can steal away. That quiet, confident joy powers me so I can touch others with my outgoing personality. I know I am a beloved child of God in whom he is well pleased.
So where am I now in the process? I am a little better. I have a long way to go. I still struggle with my pride, arrogance and selfishness on a daily basis. God is helping me be more sensitive to my thoughts and actions. I am also dealing with being strong, resilient, formidable and humble all at the same time! He is helping me share the quiet, confident joy that only he can give. All things are possible with God. I can attest to that!
Lastly, I guess I have to quote a Broadway musical or I might lose my gay card. When it comes to living my life, my way:
"But I don't want it -
No - I can't want it
Anymore:
Something has changed within me. Something is not the same..."
Praise God for his loving kindness. Praise God indeed.
Hey! It's Andy from Disciple class! Thanks for sharing this at class. I appreciate your faith and I think God is doing wonderful things with and through you :)
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